25 Weird Facts About Me

1. I can't ride a bike.
2. I've never drunk a cup of coffee.
3. I am a master of fantasy baseball. I have won our league 6 times, including each of the last 3 years. One year I drafted 2 teams and finished in first and second.
4. I hate the Smiths, the Cure, and Joy Division, and I think the Who, U2, and R.E.M. are totally overrated.
5. I own over 1,000 books but only 3 spoons and 1 glass.
6. I bought my car for $500 4 years ago. It has at least 238,243 miles on it (I say at least because the odometer no longer works). It has no A/C, the CD player is broken, all the hubcaps are gone, the right front and right rear taillights are broken, and the driver's side seat belt has to be manually unrolled.
7. I enjoyed living in Kansas far more than living in either New York or Florida.
8. I have taught approximately 2,500 college students.
9. I vomit often, and violently.
10. My first concert was Kiss and W.A.S.P. at the LA Forum in 1986.
11. I am often accused of being a liberal but I'm really more of a communist and I wish people would get it straight.
12. When I first moved to Kansas someone spraypainted "Ryan Moore is a Hotty" on the side of a train. My friends Brian and Natalie Donovan saw it and took a picture. I have no idea who did it or if it was even about me.
13. I once dressed as "The Dude" for a showing of The Big Lebowski at Colgate.
14. I have only been in one fight. In the 7th grade I punched Nick Rollins in the face because he was taunting me in front of a bunch of other kids. I ran away and then started crying when I was called into the principal's office.
15. My favorite Marxists, in this order, are: Erich Fromm, Henri Lefebvre, Herbert Marcuse, Antonio Gramsci, Walter Benjamin, and Theodor Adorno. Guy Debord would make the list if I included the other Situationists along with him.
16. I ran a marathon in June 2008.
17. The names of my fantasy baseball teams over the past 8 years: Spitzer Swallows, The Urge to Surge, The War on Christmas, The Caminiti Crackwhores, Condi's Cunthairs, Great White Pyrotechnics, The Vatican Sodomizers, The Santee Slaughter. In 2004 I wanted to name my team The Feeding Tubes in honor of Terry Shiavo, but Lance beat me to it with Feed Me Bush.
18. One of my dogs is named after 60s radical Abbie Hoffman.
19. After my punk book is published later this year my goal is to write 2 books called "The Zenarchist Manifesto" and "Marx in Vegas."
20. I took guitar lessons for 6 months but still cannot play a single song, and I haven't picked up my guitar once since I stopped taking lessons.
21. I despise Robin Williams and all things Monty Python.
22. I never get ice-cream headaches.
23. Jim Morrison died on my first birthday.
24. I went to kindergarden at an international school in Hong Kong, and some of my first memories are of being evacuated in response to bomb threats during the fall of Saigon.
25. I once got multiple rounds of free drinks at a bar because the bartender thought I was Dave Grohl. I proceeded to get drunk and play air drums to Nirvana songs on the jukebox.